Wednesday, July 29, 2009

Just Call me Crash~

So Sunday it was wondrous out..Beautiful day for being out on the lake..the day started out just on the water at 11:00..started tubing right away..then we got to Anderson beach in Vantage a beach that everyone pulls up too..and I wanted to go wake boarding so I went out on a different boat with some friends. I got strapped in and was all excited everything felt PERFECT..I got up first try like always swung out to the side to come in to jump the wake...was going smoothly..I went and jumped it didn't feel right and my board caught the water I went forward and crashed (sure I'm use to it everyone crashes) well I didn't feel it right away but the board came back and hit me in the head and I came up gushing blood from a cut on my right temple. I didn't know I was bleeding mind you...everyone on the boat freaked out and said "oh my god Nicole you are bleeding get over here" I put my hand up and felt it and usually this is where I FREAK I hate blood and know what I did..I laughed and couldn't stop laughing..they thought something was wrong with me. So I got pulled up on the boat and bandaged up and what sucked is the rest of the day out there every time I got in the water I started gushing again and everyone freaked. So we called it a day and went home by then I had a HUGE headache and was really really tired. I got home and my mom saw and flipped she made me go into the er and sure enough I had a pretty good concussion cause I wasn't making sense and delirious and plus it was a gaping hole on my temple so I got 4 stitches 24 hour watch to make sure I will wake up and no driving for a couple days... NOW as of today I have a swollen right side and a black eye that keeps getting worse and a headache...and I only got to jump once..that SUCKS!

But any who..on another ex Zack who I broke up with in April..have been talking alot and we decided we wanted to give it another try and work through things together and I am really excited! I have never felt for anyone like I do for Zack..we have a connection I have never felt with anyone else..he knows me better then anyone even my mother. He has always loved me and I have never doubted that at all...we just had our rough patches but everyone goes through those..It's the ones who can work through them together to fix things that make it and then there are those who give up and walk away like I have done..but I realized I still love him and want to make things wish us luck..I'll definitely be blogging more and moving back to Spokane here within the next month yay!!
My black eye on Tuesday!

Saturday, July 25, 2009

I got it done!

I got my Monroe done what do you think? is definitely a rollar coaster

Well hello fellow bloggers I have returned and am wiping the dust off me right now as I pick myself up off the floor. I feel like this is a regular thing for kicks me down alot..recently I had major issues with a guy! After getting out of a horrible relationship and hanging out and seeing what life has to offer I made a commitment about a month ago to this guy and everything started out great then spiraled downward when he just wasn't putting in the effort and I was fed up and the night before he is suppose to leave for Vegas I leave the bar because he wasn't picking up my hints and me telling him I wanted to go home and since I LEFT I am the bad guy and I go home crying because he won't talk to me or want to find out why I am upset...he then leaves for Vegas the next day and doesn't talk to me for 4 days then last night randomly texts me and I was SO upset that I let my friend handle it and tell him off....god why is it I find these guys...that I become attached to and they just don't give a fuck! I mean I took a big chance especially having a son and being new to dating again and he knew this..but he still stomped on my heart...and still he doesn't even act like he is hurt what so ever..or care that I am can he be so calm? I thought we were getting serious but I guess not...and I wish I just knew answers...who I am suppose to be with??..when do I find him and if I have found him then please tell me what am I suppose to do???..My head is going in a million different directions..and on top of that my ex of 4 years my baby's in a new relationship and in love and openly expressing it all over the place..I had to delete my Myspace to escape it..and now I have to worry about my son and this new girl my ex is trying to push into the life can be so cruel sometimes..but hey you have pick yourself up every time and dust yourself off...and keep moving forward or else you will lay there and people will continue to walk on you..its things like this that make us stronger and able to approach new situations better...